undiscovered.

From time to time, a small crunch of pain stricken our necks forcing us into thinking we're stuck in our situation. Then with a twist or sudden movement, pop, the pain is gone temporarily.

The same goes for most of daily dilemmas, or homework.. Here and gone, only to be back again. Reevaluating my life lately, I've come to some pretty great realizations, figuring out that I've been building myself up lately from the outside. I've been paying too much attention to the aesthetics rather than the structure that withholds every emotion, every event, and every great love. While anyone can redecorate, or change some furniture arrangements, it takes strong, mindful thinking to restructure rooms, or levels of how large or small you want your house to be. My mindset for the longest time was the more the merrier, the larger the house, the more friends the merrier. None of it was making me happy, for it had only been causing me more tribulations as I lay out the work week. More often that not, I would compare my aesthetics to everyone else, thinking, 'well I can do it better', in which many ways I can, and feel my way of life overcomes most, but it doesn't make me better and should never make me feel inadequate.

I am my own house, and its continuing effort for perfection will continue for as long as I live.

No one is perfect, and no one can ever reach perfection. In every cheesy cliche alive, with great power comes great responsibility. I had a friend recently write a tale about judging others, while it brought a simple tale of never judging a book by its cover, the nature of the story fell through, for his own mindset doesn't follow his writing. So in my house analogy, it was much like building from the outside in, which never works. His frame of mind beset the outside image of words. In todays everyday life, we're all unique, framed by events that both hurt and inspire our goals, but we're often beset on the outside of how we look, rather than how we were built. From what drives the minds in college to continue is a mystery. The events of drinking, being sexually active, driving on the acceptance of others continues to be a mystery in many ways. For when most people appear to be self-confident, most are not, instead covering their own imperfection by mocking others. The emotions we feel, we often cover up by provoking others and saying "i'm ok". We tend to heighten the event by focusing primarily on our own situation, blocking out and taking for granted everything else around us, often losing many opportunities, and many friends in the process. We often think we've pushed the hold button, thinking everyone around us will still be there when we're gone. However, like myself in others lives, I can't focus too hard on them.

So in everyday life, we're struggling to overcome the past. What we do right now, plays the ultimate role into what will happen next. Our actions will define who we are ultimately, both to ourselves and others. How we interpret what others might feel is really up to us. While no one in the world can please everyone, the most important person we can please is ourself. For no one will judge, criticize, praise, or love ourselves harder than our own self.